On getting things from the floor:
Me: "Jairo, can you get that pencil near your foot?"Jairo: *Stares*
Me: "C'mon, I don't want to get down."
Jairo: *Stares, giggles* Good, you shouldn't want to get down while you're doing your job *winks*
Me: -_- Just get me the pencil.
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On frog reproduction:
Me: "So the female lays her eggs near water and the male releases his sperm so that fertilization occurs."
Student 1: So this happens outside the body??
Me: "Yes, this is NOT like humans."
Student 2: So there's no intercourse?
Me: "No. NOT like humans."
Student 1: "That's BORING!"
Me: "If you're looking to frog reproduction for some excitement, I'm sorry for you."
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On genetics:
Me: "Okay, here is a picture (of my family). Please write down why you think the people in the picture are related."
Students yelling out: "You look like your mom! How old is your sister? You look so young! How old were you in that picture?"
Me: Alright guys, enough, I just wanted to get the conversation started on the genes we get from our parents.
*The class settles down, students start writing.*
A girl in my class: Daaaang, her dad is fiiiiine!
Me: Excuse me?! Please don't talk about my dad that way.
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That was just in one day. I swear I could die laughing in that class. It's a terrible thing. Somehow they also have the highest science scores out of all my classes. More quotes to come.
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